I feel like I’m in this weird phase right now. A little ashamed of myself and a little lost but still hopeful. I just can’t seem to get the negative self talk in my head and its really irritating. I can ignore but sometimes it keeps coming up. I guess I just have to keep ignoring. Ugh I just feel like a little in a funk right now. I went out last night and it was actually fun. But now that I’m awake and sober I just can’t seem to help but just think negatively. It seriously is one of those days. And I know its normal and I know it happens to everyone. But all I want to do is just to stop vicious cycle. I know I am the reason why I can be my worst enemy. I know. The fact that I don’t talk about it to other people for me feels like I’m validating it. That’s why I only tell people I really trust wholeheartedly. To me it feels like an addiction at times. But I’ll learn. I’ll learn how to break the habit. I will. Ugh I want to get out this phase.

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