I finally got a reply back from where I wanted to work ideally. I told my friends I`ve met in the program I was because I want to share with them that I finally got it. One of my friends was super happy for me but the other one was like wth I messaged them and they have even replied to me. She was already doing her practicum there and she was hired but apparently noone responded back to her. Initially I felt really guilty like you told me about that post to apply to. But then when were talking about it even more she asked when I applied and I applied on the 21st and she told me she applied on the 19th. But I completely remember her telling to apply for the post on the 24th. I already applied for jobs way beforehand and I happened to already have applied for that post. So I was wondering wth? You tell me to apply for it way after you? I get it you were there first and obviously look out for yourself first. But I don`t know if I am wrong for feeling this way but Its like I told her I got a reply and the first thing she does was email her manager and its like she took my job away. I`ve looked at the positions I`ve applied for and the day she told me shes hired and she got in that position closed. Like I am kinda mad that she took that away from me but at the same time I would feel guilty if I never told her that I got that position. It`s like when I told her was the issue for me. Yes, she did good luck but it was like half-assed. Like she wanted it more than me. Like I get it but as your friend I would expect you to support me and actually genuinely be happy that I got it. Because honestly before this, apparently she was suppose to tell me and gf to finish our papers to get into that place we wanted to get into but she didn`t because she said she forgot but she did them and got in. Like initially I was mad at my instructor. But now I wonder if shes one of those girls that are only happy for you when you are not doing better than them. Yeah, I admit I was kinda pissed that I didn`t get it for the practicum and she got it but at that moment I pushed aside my feelings because I genuinely was happy that she got it. I would rather have one of my closer classmates get it than anyone else. But I wonder if I should even feel guilty. I don`t know if you understand what I mean but.. its like when you`re really good friends with someone they care about your feelings first, and you do the same with them because thats just the way you guys are with eachother. That you would say whoever gets it, gets it No harsh feelings and that we would congratulate each other even if you didn`t get it yourself but with her I wonder. Like she`ll be like oh sorry or bitter that she didn`t get it. Like doesn`t even really care. I dont`know maybe I`m tripping but I don`t think she would help me as much as I would help her.

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